i have always known that letting out our inner demons most times help us heal or somewhat help put those demons in check. some do it by blogging, some by lashing out at everything around them, some by talking to people about it, some by messing with people (vera) and some by writting poetry. i tend to do some of the aforementioned but still i find out i have more to let out. i guess i have more held up in me than i actually thot.
been reading the unconfusing posts confusednaijagirl had put up since the short minute ago she started blogging, particularly the culture of silence blog post. dont know what or how but it got me thinking about naija, its society and how they take things like this with less than a grain of salt.
anywho, while running thru newspapers this morning, one in particular caught my detention. its headline read,"POETIC JUSTICE" and i was like these slanting island paparazzi people don come again o. KI LO TUN DE? (meaning, whats it this time?) reading on, it then dawned on me, there more to this than just a newspaper headline.
said, story was about how a traumatized -slanting island girl who was sexually abused by her FAMILY FRIEND three years ago- finally broke her silence by letting out demons from her being in the form of a heartbreaking poem and handing it in to her teacher. who acted right and thus got the 48 years old man arrested.
her distressing cry for help, which was submitted as a school homework assignment led to the arrest of her assaulter. the poem wasnt published but excerpts from the poem she wrote is what i retyped below.
"As i lay in bed with tears in my eyes all i could do is ask myself, why?"
she went further...
"He told me if i told anyone, he would beat me"
"No matter what, i'm scared no one would believe me"
"I said NO and screamed for help, but pain was all i felt"
"He touched me and forced me to do things i didnt want to do"
"A loving father is what he's supposed to be"
"But instead he's a rapist that just raped me"
"So as i lay in bed with tears in my eyes"
"all i could do is ask myself, why, oh why?"
reading this and trying to put it together the way she had put it in her homeowrk assignment, i cant help but feel the hurt the lil girl must be feeling. for some reason i dont know, i'm forced to think what if it is someone i know, what if its someone close to me. why do people act like goats who would run after their own offspring.
i dont know wat conclusion to give this piece, the hurt i feel cannot be compared to what the victims feel but it even hurts more to think of how many young nigerian girls are living with this DEMON perfectly engraved in their systems.
make i comot this blog b4 my own demons show face this nite. CAIO like my italian friends would say.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Friday, January 26, 2007
birthday
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY LIL' SISTER!
HAVE A TWO_DA_FUL BIRTHDAY!
come to slanting island make we go nourish serious nourishment of your choose on my bill.
HAVE A TWO_DA_FUL BIRTHDAY!
come to slanting island make we go nourish serious nourishment of your choose on my bill.
what if....
its been a long road, my short long life has had its ups and not so up moments. sometimes i wonder what if i had done some things differently. what would the outcome of the permutation and combination be. well i cant say for sure what the outcomes would have been but i sure know i'm totally ok with the way things turned out.
...what if on that faithful day, at age 18, i had signed up to join the marines on that faithful day at the American embassy in lagos. today i might just be getting outta service like my cousin did late last year and now studying to become a fashion guru.
...what if i had gone the way of some of my buddies and had joined them in science class. taking physics istead of finance, taking chemistry instead of commerce, taking further maths instead of accounting. who knows maibe i might have patented a pen that would do our course work and exams.
...what if i had given a lil more attention to sports, i might have gone on to become a professional athlete like david beckham or an henry.
...what if my music teacher in junior high was not such a boring, talent killing fellow, i might have been the next mozart or perhaps some music genius.
...what if i had picked literature over geography, and read shakespare's julius ceasar and macbeth, instead of map reading, landforms, and ocean currents. who knows i might be a better writer than i am now and not watch the discovery channel and national geographic all day.
...what if i was the last child in the family, would i be as spoilt as people expect last born children to be? or would i be who i am now, the only male child yet, i'm not anywhere close to being spoilt. or so i think.
anywhose on that note, i'd like to wish my darling lil sister, SHERIFAH, YESIDE, OYINDAMOLA, ADUFE, (last name withheld) a HAPPY 24th BIRTHDAY. i've known you all your 24 years in this world and i could not ask for any other lil sister than you.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIL' SIS... MAY ALL YOUR WISHES COME THROUGH.
This is to many more years of you being an INSPIRATION to many people and to yourself. This is to many more years of you making me take you on shopping sprees on my bill. This is to many more years of you being my lil sister. MAY ALL YOUR WISHES AND ASPIRATIONS BE YOURS. AMIN.
cheers! with a glass of ice tea which has been driven thru long island...
...what if on that faithful day, at age 18, i had signed up to join the marines on that faithful day at the American embassy in lagos. today i might just be getting outta service like my cousin did late last year and now studying to become a fashion guru.
...what if i had gone the way of some of my buddies and had joined them in science class. taking physics istead of finance, taking chemistry instead of commerce, taking further maths instead of accounting. who knows maibe i might have patented a pen that would do our course work and exams.
...what if i had given a lil more attention to sports, i might have gone on to become a professional athlete like david beckham or an henry.
...what if my music teacher in junior high was not such a boring, talent killing fellow, i might have been the next mozart or perhaps some music genius.
...what if i had picked literature over geography, and read shakespare's julius ceasar and macbeth, instead of map reading, landforms, and ocean currents. who knows i might be a better writer than i am now and not watch the discovery channel and national geographic all day.
...what if i was the last child in the family, would i be as spoilt as people expect last born children to be? or would i be who i am now, the only male child yet, i'm not anywhere close to being spoilt. or so i think.
anywhose on that note, i'd like to wish my darling lil sister, SHERIFAH, YESIDE, OYINDAMOLA, ADUFE, (last name withheld) a HAPPY 24th BIRTHDAY. i've known you all your 24 years in this world and i could not ask for any other lil sister than you.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIL' SIS... MAY ALL YOUR WISHES COME THROUGH.
This is to many more years of you being an INSPIRATION to many people and to yourself. This is to many more years of you making me take you on shopping sprees on my bill. This is to many more years of you being my lil sister. MAY ALL YOUR WISHES AND ASPIRATIONS BE YOURS. AMIN.
cheers! with a glass of ice tea which has been driven thru long island...
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
numerous talkings
hey people, how una dey? kilon wassup? ke du? ba wo ni? ya ya de? i dont have much to blog about o. i just had to put stuff up all in the name of updating.
y'all guess wat happened to me today. the one and only green eyed yellow girl called me at 4 o'clock this afternoon, problem is, she has never called me earlier than 10pm b4 since i've known her. i didnt know whether to be scared and run like fire on the mountain. anyway, i was like vera how now? next thing she starts making passes at me. that one made me even more scared cos vera and I no dey use eye see. anyway long story short, she opened up to me that she was buttering me up cos of diamond hawks threat to search for her picture. damn i knew all that buttering up wasnt for nothing. anyway vera, u r still the only blue fish in my fish tank so i would treat u nicely till i find another blue fish.
moving on...i finally started sleeping and eating all over again. yeah i know i didnt tell you guys. i had not been eating neither had i been sleeping. last night i slept close to 7hours with lil or no break in transmission. i had made up my mind on friday while driving back from maryland, that not eating or sleeping wasnt an option. so if what it takes is for me to drink nyquil at night just so i could sleep. i'll be glad to get back to my sleeping ways. my eating, well all i'll do is think of mama eda( aka mama engineerAyo) and how she would sit beside me with EBA STICK while growing up and voila the plate is empty. ask cherub about me, she knows food and I are like twinces. so for me not to eat was a big concern for me. plus i actually lost weight, my lil self lost even more pounds.
anyways i'm getting back to my eating ways and in case y'all need someone to invite over for dinner, i'll be glad to do u a favor and honor ur call. i'll lend you a helping mouth...
i got a wedding notice in the mail today, my italian friend is getting married in september. she cant wait to see my ghanian friend and I throw it down that day plus I owe her a dance too cos i gave her a raincheck a while back and she is going to redeem it that day.
y'all guess wat happened to me today. the one and only green eyed yellow girl called me at 4 o'clock this afternoon, problem is, she has never called me earlier than 10pm b4 since i've known her. i didnt know whether to be scared and run like fire on the mountain. anyway, i was like vera how now? next thing she starts making passes at me. that one made me even more scared cos vera and I no dey use eye see. anyway long story short, she opened up to me that she was buttering me up cos of diamond hawks threat to search for her picture. damn i knew all that buttering up wasnt for nothing. anyway vera, u r still the only blue fish in my fish tank so i would treat u nicely till i find another blue fish.
moving on...i finally started sleeping and eating all over again. yeah i know i didnt tell you guys. i had not been eating neither had i been sleeping. last night i slept close to 7hours with lil or no break in transmission. i had made up my mind on friday while driving back from maryland, that not eating or sleeping wasnt an option. so if what it takes is for me to drink nyquil at night just so i could sleep. i'll be glad to get back to my sleeping ways. my eating, well all i'll do is think of mama eda( aka mama engineerAyo) and how she would sit beside me with EBA STICK while growing up and voila the plate is empty. ask cherub about me, she knows food and I are like twinces. so for me not to eat was a big concern for me. plus i actually lost weight, my lil self lost even more pounds.
anyways i'm getting back to my eating ways and in case y'all need someone to invite over for dinner, i'll be glad to do u a favor and honor ur call. i'll lend you a helping mouth...
i got a wedding notice in the mail today, my italian friend is getting married in september. she cant wait to see my ghanian friend and I throw it down that day plus I owe her a dance too cos i gave her a raincheck a while back and she is going to redeem it that day.
Saturday, January 20, 2007
my space
you gave me reason to be happy
you gave me reason to smile
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you made me a better person
you gave me reason to care
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you made me treat myself different
you made me grin from ear to ear
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you gave me someone to care for
you gave me something to live for
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you showed me parts of me i never knew existed
you showed me what i should do different
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you gave me a reason to give my 100%
you made me open up to a fourth person other than ME, MYSELF n I
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
we were friends before this long minute passed
we will remain friends now that the long minute has passed
you dont have to feel bad about everything and anything
i should have known not to leave MY SPACE
it was fun sharing MY SPACE with you
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
scrap all that you just read... i still share MY SPACE with you
i'm happy i shared MY SPACE with you
thanks for sharing MY SPACE with me
you gave me reason to smile
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you made me a better person
you gave me reason to care
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you made me treat myself different
you made me grin from ear to ear
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you gave me someone to care for
you gave me something to live for
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you showed me parts of me i never knew existed
you showed me what i should do different
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
you gave me a reason to give my 100%
you made me open up to a fourth person other than ME, MYSELF n I
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
we were friends before this long minute passed
we will remain friends now that the long minute has passed
you dont have to feel bad about everything and anything
i should have known not to leave MY SPACE
it was fun sharing MY SPACE with you
i can still remember how it started
...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE
scrap all that you just read... i still share MY SPACE with you
i'm happy i shared MY SPACE with you
thanks for sharing MY SPACE with me
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
ONB's TAG
this is in honor of ONB and her TAG! all these people who read her blog and wont do her tag.
1.) How old were you the first time? too young
2.) Name of your first? errmmmm she is isomewhere in the north east
3.) Good or Bad? hmmm! cant remember, think it was one of those things we rushed in and out of.
4.) Name of the worst and why? hmmmm dont know
5.) Name of the best and why? she knows herself, she knows she is.
6.) Weirdest place you ever had sex? the place dont count in my books
7.) Favorite Position: dont know if it has a name, cant describe it for y'all either.
8.) Ever fake an orgasm? do guys have orgasms?
9.) Would you admit it if the person asked? do guys have orgasms?
10.) Favorite time of day to have sex? dont have a time table
11.) Most times you have had sex in one day? hmmm i'll be back make i rewind recount am.
12.) Same person? why not
13.) Ever fantasize about someone other than the one you’re with? hmmmmmmm isnt that cheating...
14.) Restrictions during sex? ...depends on what the definition of restrictions is
15.) Accessories? i know where planet pleasure is on slanting island but i've never used any of their merchandise b4. plus are there any accessories for guys?
16.) What? WATER!
17.) Done it in the rain? does a wet body make the cut?
18.) Done it in a car? why not just hold the adrenalin till u get behind the door
19.) Had a Threesome? dont share
20.) Want to have sex now? nahhh
1.) How old were you the first time? too young
2.) Name of your first? errmmmm she is isomewhere in the north east
3.) Good or Bad? hmmm! cant remember, think it was one of those things we rushed in and out of.
4.) Name of the worst and why? hmmmm dont know
5.) Name of the best and why? she knows herself, she knows she is.
6.) Weirdest place you ever had sex? the place dont count in my books
7.) Favorite Position: dont know if it has a name, cant describe it for y'all either.
8.) Ever fake an orgasm? do guys have orgasms?
9.) Would you admit it if the person asked? do guys have orgasms?
10.) Favorite time of day to have sex? dont have a time table
11.) Most times you have had sex in one day? hmmm i'll be back make i rewind recount am.
12.) Same person? why not
13.) Ever fantasize about someone other than the one you’re with? hmmmmmmm isnt that cheating...
14.) Restrictions during sex? ...depends on what the definition of restrictions is
15.) Accessories? i know where planet pleasure is on slanting island but i've never used any of their merchandise b4. plus are there any accessories for guys?
16.) What? WATER!
17.) Done it in the rain? does a wet body make the cut?
18.) Done it in a car? why not just hold the adrenalin till u get behind the door
19.) Had a Threesome? dont share
20.) Want to have sex now? nahhh
Friday, January 12, 2007
think think
i've read some blog posts and comments on how people advocate orisirisi. i've seen people beat their chests harder than king kong all in support of NO SEXUAL HEALING TILL MARRIAGE....but being the deep thinker that i am. i start to think, i start to think think....if what is right is no sex b4 marriage, then wat happens to my neighbour ms white who got divorced a lil minute ago. now she is seeing mr. marker. would you say she has to wait to get married to mr marker b4 she can get her kerewa on. cos technically she married innit. she has fulfilled that requirement or maibe its just me. opinions needed abeg...
Thursday, January 11, 2007
disgruntled shirt
i dey vex o! i dey vex!
somebody beg me b4 i overvex!
i dey vex o! i dey vex!
no i'm not loosing it. i'm having a serious case of hypervexing like someone whose girlfriend just got stolen from him. this is matter of emergency someone contact the department of houseland security.
you wonder why i'mn over vexing right! its simple as ABC. i washed my awesome shirt today o, and b4 i could say shokolokobangoshe, the black color from the shirt had messed up the white cuffs and collar. i am so totally outraged (i sound like a white boy) about this its not even funny. i am mechanically and systematically confused about what to do with this expensive play this thing has caused. its so bad that u wont have to get close to me to realize that someting about my shirt isnt right. this is a serious case of shirt malfunction.
i am at a motor crossroad on wat to do with my shirt, the options are these:
1. throw the shirt in the trash after only wearing it one time.
2. take it to the cloth engineer(tailor) and have them take out the white part of the collar and i could always fold in the cuffs when i wear it.
3. go back to the store where i bought it and demand a refund and throw a tantrum while i'm at it. (after somn like 4 months)
4. just go out and buy more shirts.
now i'm scared to wear the all white one because i cant help but think of the possibility of the white washing against the white collar and cuffs. thats how traumatized i am.
on a non-vexing note, 2007 is just in its second week and things have started showing signs of them getting better. i finally went to see auntyD in amityville (bijou dont even open ur mouth there) after almost 5years. i told you 2007 is going to be different. and yes, talking about different, i've been called Akon by some people and i've been called seal(without the scars) by others all within 2weeks of 2007. hmmmmm thats a good start right. even my cousin couldnt help but rub my head when i got this not so new look of mines. BALD NUDE HEAD ... which had always been my style only this time i have decided to add on a goatee instead leaving my face nude as always. i dont know if thats wats been making people comment. at some point some lady(married) that i was talking to at work started asking orisirisi questions about igba awo koko baba ishasun (rusty yoruba). anyways i'll be back to blog about my amittyville trips, meeting omodudu and bijouxoxoxoxoxo.
somebody beg me b4 i overvex!
i dey vex o! i dey vex!
no i'm not loosing it. i'm having a serious case of hypervexing like someone whose girlfriend just got stolen from him. this is matter of emergency someone contact the department of houseland security.
you wonder why i'mn over vexing right! its simple as ABC. i washed my awesome shirt today o, and b4 i could say shokolokobangoshe, the black color from the shirt had messed up the white cuffs and collar. i am so totally outraged (i sound like a white boy) about this its not even funny. i am mechanically and systematically confused about what to do with this expensive play this thing has caused. its so bad that u wont have to get close to me to realize that someting about my shirt isnt right. this is a serious case of shirt malfunction.
i am at a motor crossroad on wat to do with my shirt, the options are these:
1. throw the shirt in the trash after only wearing it one time.
2. take it to the cloth engineer(tailor) and have them take out the white part of the collar and i could always fold in the cuffs when i wear it.
3. go back to the store where i bought it and demand a refund and throw a tantrum while i'm at it. (after somn like 4 months)
4. just go out and buy more shirts.
now i'm scared to wear the all white one because i cant help but think of the possibility of the white washing against the white collar and cuffs. thats how traumatized i am.
on a non-vexing note, 2007 is just in its second week and things have started showing signs of them getting better. i finally went to see auntyD in amityville (bijou dont even open ur mouth there) after almost 5years. i told you 2007 is going to be different. and yes, talking about different, i've been called Akon by some people and i've been called seal(without the scars) by others all within 2weeks of 2007. hmmmmm thats a good start right. even my cousin couldnt help but rub my head when i got this not so new look of mines. BALD NUDE HEAD ... which had always been my style only this time i have decided to add on a goatee instead leaving my face nude as always. i dont know if thats wats been making people comment. at some point some lady(married) that i was talking to at work started asking orisirisi questions about igba awo koko baba ishasun (rusty yoruba). anyways i'll be back to blog about my amittyville trips, meeting omodudu and bijouxoxoxoxoxo.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
2006...
i know 2007 is 3 days old and is already clocking puberty. i just cant move on without rewinding 2006 for a last quick lil minute.
In 2006, i became of blogger. its been fun thus far. i've met quite some crazy bunch. read comments that made me think, read some that made me look sane, and i actually put up some comments that made me look even more insane than i thot i was. but all well its all part of what makes bloggers, bloggers.
In 2006, i got reconnected with humpty(my buddy from highschool), we hardly ever see each other cos he lives in jersey even though slanting island is just a bridge crossing away, i need to fix that in 2007.
In 2006, i met missDBL, she is awesome peoples. she brought out a better me that i didnt know really existed. you showed me the color of love, i really appreciate that a truch load much.
In 2006, i moved on to life after college, which is sure filled with a lot of ups and downs. it has given me a couple of headaches and brainaches but i sure will get past all that in 2007.
In 2006, i also learnt never to make someone my priority when to them i'm just an option. yeah, i know i shoulda known that long ago. i actually did know but then some things make you forget some things.
In 2006, close to its end that is, i had a lot of things, emotions, ati be be lo bottled up inside me. a change in 2007 would be that i'll say stuff out more often that way i wont have a close call like i did in 2006 where i almost did a Flambé
recipe with my system.
In 2006, i made a lot more trips to the masjid(mosque) than i made previously and i'm improving my stats in 2007. Insha Allah.
In 2006, i lost my uncle, and would do as much as i can to help out my cousins whom he left behind. So help me God.
In 2006, i became a lot more vocal. i think that was cos people saw me as somewhat a quiet pushover. lil did they know that the volcano in my being was being forced not to erupt. i even went past my all time high of 2005 which was when i went to naija and "friends" expected me to be the always quiet ME who they always tended to get away with murder with. i was referred to as being a loud person but i was only letting my voice be heard.
In 2006, i kept family away for too long a time. i'm sorry mum for not calling as often as u want me to call. i'm sorry dad for calling u only once in 3months, i'm sorry 'Mo(my niece) for not always calling even though u ask after me from ur mum all the time, to my sisters, i'm sorry i dont always call, although y'all take time out to call ur only brother. i'm sorry uncleseses and auntieseses for never calling to see how y'all are doing but i do ask after u from mum whenever i call though. i'm sorry Timi, wale and sherry for not calling or emailing u often, you all still are my most awesome cousins. and thanks for taking care of bashir ur lil brother. lil man donn grown now.
In 2007, FAMILY COMES FIRST, i'm going to make calling yall and keeping in touch with y'all my hobby. i'm not promising cos i dont promise. but when i say i'll do something i would. for starters, i've called mama eda (my mum) twice in 2007 already, i've called baba eda(dad) once, called a couple of uncles and would be calling my niece miss 'Mo this weekend. we need to have uncle and niece bonding. did i tell u all she asked when i was coming home. yeah she did, miss 'Mo misses me yet i dont call her often enough. thats all going to change in 2007.
In 2006, i became of blogger. its been fun thus far. i've met quite some crazy bunch. read comments that made me think, read some that made me look sane, and i actually put up some comments that made me look even more insane than i thot i was. but all well its all part of what makes bloggers, bloggers.
In 2006, i got reconnected with humpty(my buddy from highschool), we hardly ever see each other cos he lives in jersey even though slanting island is just a bridge crossing away, i need to fix that in 2007.
In 2006, i met missDBL, she is awesome peoples. she brought out a better me that i didnt know really existed. you showed me the color of love, i really appreciate that a truch load much.
In 2006, i moved on to life after college, which is sure filled with a lot of ups and downs. it has given me a couple of headaches and brainaches but i sure will get past all that in 2007.
In 2006, i also learnt never to make someone my priority when to them i'm just an option. yeah, i know i shoulda known that long ago. i actually did know but then some things make you forget some things.
In 2006, close to its end that is, i had a lot of things, emotions, ati be be lo bottled up inside me. a change in 2007 would be that i'll say stuff out more often that way i wont have a close call like i did in 2006 where i almost did a Flambé
recipe with my system.
In 2006, i made a lot more trips to the masjid(mosque) than i made previously and i'm improving my stats in 2007. Insha Allah.
In 2006, i lost my uncle, and would do as much as i can to help out my cousins whom he left behind. So help me God.
In 2006, i became a lot more vocal. i think that was cos people saw me as somewhat a quiet pushover. lil did they know that the volcano in my being was being forced not to erupt. i even went past my all time high of 2005 which was when i went to naija and "friends" expected me to be the always quiet ME who they always tended to get away with murder with. i was referred to as being a loud person but i was only letting my voice be heard.
In 2006, i kept family away for too long a time. i'm sorry mum for not calling as often as u want me to call. i'm sorry dad for calling u only once in 3months, i'm sorry 'Mo(my niece) for not always calling even though u ask after me from ur mum all the time, to my sisters, i'm sorry i dont always call, although y'all take time out to call ur only brother. i'm sorry uncleseses and auntieseses for never calling to see how y'all are doing but i do ask after u from mum whenever i call though. i'm sorry Timi, wale and sherry for not calling or emailing u often, you all still are my most awesome cousins. and thanks for taking care of bashir ur lil brother. lil man donn grown now.
In 2007, FAMILY COMES FIRST, i'm going to make calling yall and keeping in touch with y'all my hobby. i'm not promising cos i dont promise. but when i say i'll do something i would. for starters, i've called mama eda (my mum) twice in 2007 already, i've called baba eda(dad) once, called a couple of uncles and would be calling my niece miss 'Mo this weekend. we need to have uncle and niece bonding. did i tell u all she asked when i was coming home. yeah she did, miss 'Mo misses me yet i dont call her often enough. thats all going to change in 2007.
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