The mind of Engineer_AYO

the original video was removed, hopefully this one wont.

ok my bornday is a stone throw away. i dont know whats gonna happen, i dont expect to get any gifts from most people. cheap ass vera you better give me something or u can count urself step-husbandless, do not give me excuses. on a seriouser note though. i'm going to boston for my birthday weekend. i love driving thus 4hrs would be like drinking garri milk and sugar. i feel like venting, but i dont know where to start, a lot of bookshit is happeneing thats pissing me the shit off. it sucks cos its kinda out of my control too. God dey sha, i'll be over it sooner than i could expect. i've been quiet for a minute on this blog, not that i dont have stuff to blog about but i just dont have the internal inuendum to sit and type out my thots et all. i hope to get back to blogging cos i feel the steam building up in me again and my blog or just doing blog rounds sometimes serves as a release valve.

ok, you ppl. my birthday is a month away o. and i have decided to ask for just one gift. normally i dont ask for stuff but i feel i should ask this year and see those who would actually give a gift. i have asked some for $600 shoe which i would be surprised if i actually get it. (they all expect gifts for theirs yet they dont give gift) dont let the price of the shoe fool u into thinking its not affordable o, it is very affordable. b4 i forget, abeg these naija people have come again with their wahala o, when will they ever copy something right. u wonder wat i'm making noise about. its all this their reality show copying habit o. they forget the logistics that it entails and just throw something out there. i read on the BBC website that some innocent contestant drowned during one of their nonsenseseses. dem forget say american shows get enough behind the scene cast, extras ati be be lo. ranging from medics, to life savers abi se na life guard dem dey call dem. anywho soon they woul...

hey people, i've MIA for twice months and change. a lot has happened during that time. i've been to maryland twice, one for cherub's sisters grad and the other for funmie's lil sisters BBQ (at least thats wat vera and funmie made it seem like allthough na soso overage ppl full there. anyway, at the BBQ i put my enginering ability to work. I was the mesuya, enough grilling, wat didnt i grill u name it, it was on the menu, naija style suya (not the sorry excuse for BBQ some people feed you with) Asun (essabanty you do well o) roasted yam, fish, corn, boli (roasted plantains)and all the other stuff icant remember. If not for God "ube" (spelling) for dey there sef. anywho, engineerAyo did his thing and vera and funmie started thinking of and planning the next BBQ the very next day. then i went to toronto, i know say overwhelmed go throw tantrum for me on this one but make she no vex. anywho, i went to toronto o Via ohio. you ask me wetin i find go ohio first abi. ...

hey my people na body? how na dey? sorry for not blogging for a extra long minute. na condition make fish begin do family planning. i've had a couple of ups and downs but i've kept myself in one piece thus far. i'll be back to give y'all gist about the bookshytes i've been up to. e.g. my trip to toronto, detour thru detroit to eat amala. their speed limit in Km and gas flipping expensive. anywho make i never too talk, update on all the NY bookshytes too, MARS 2112, my trip first beach trip since i've been in NY, damn i cant believe i stayed this long b4 i got disvirgined or for lack of a better word, beachvirgined. my nonsense friend who wants to get married next summer or so she thinks. my adopted aburo who is having a 21st bornday bash this friday is threatening fire if i dont attend. like say that would make me change my mind. anywho work dey tomorrow make all men go catch sleep "blueberry lomo"

a lot has been happening around me, in my head and everywhere in between. the metamorphosis is wat i have been willing to blog about for a long while but each time i start typing, i chicken out and just simply delete the post or i save it to draft. anyway, during one of my unlimited sessions of thinking things in search of my peace of mind, i was rudely interupted by a fone call. picked up and it was O.F. she was like hey mr. wats up we have gist. anyway being the listening ear that i am (note i didnt not say amebo) i listened and at the end of the listening sessions i came up with this question. what would you do if you go into ur dads room to get a dvd,vcd,wateverumacallit. u get there and a couple of them looked like the one u wanted. u turn on the dvd player to test it out and at that point P and time T u get the surprise of all surprises. their was a dvd already in and its contents was shocking to the marrow of ur bone. long story short, the said dvd contained porn. what would be ...

hey people. wats good? its been a rather long minute. this is kinda like the intro to the metamorphosis of me blog post i had wanted to put up for the past longshort minute. basically it would talk about me, how i've been, and how different situations around me have (for lack of a better) changed me. some have brought me full circle, some have not but all in all, everything put together sorta seems to me like a metamorphosis of sort. anyways y'all be good (yeah right) like you would actually listen. i'll be back for what might be part one or maibe a shorthand version of the whole thing.

its been raining for like forever. i slept with 12inches of water in my basement lastnight. it had receeded a lil bit by this morning. had to be at work, dont know how my basement looks like right now. hopefully all my summer cloths are not messed up. cant imagine shopping for stuff i didnt have to shop for. :( :( :( :( Inna lillahi wainna ilayhi rajiAAoona.(Q2 vs 156) just got news that my grandma from my second mum has passed. Rest in peace Grandma. Who, when afflicted with calamity, say: "Truly! to Allah we belong and truly, to him we shall return." (Surat Al-Baqara, Chapter #2, Verse #156)

hey people, how has your week been? mine has been hectic like say we dey war zone. anywho, i came online to blog about some serious stuff. (the metamorphosis of me. Part 1.5) but i had to upload some stuff i've been holding back for y'all b4 doing that. i hope you awesome people would not think of me different after reading this, cos i'll need all the support and encouragement i can get. B4 i start uploading wats on my mind. lately i've been listening to BBC news at work and yesterday i heard on there that female civil servants (govt workers) are required to fill out an appraisal and the rules require them to give information about their menstrual cycle, the last time tehy took maternity leave, etc etc etc etc. i dont know for them o but one think i can bet my money on is that, it is a man that came up with the idea. its funny to me cos i dont understand how this piece of information would benefit the indian Govt. i cant help but laugh at this orisirisi beautiful nonse...

hey my people, fellow manbeings and womanbeings. Guess what! 71 is the new 21! yeah i said it. if u dont know, now u know. i finally got over the hangover i suffered from going to MD (it was a hangover well suffered my people, read on to find out) my weekend in MD for Vera's mum gig was totally fantalistic (i need more of those weekend getaways 4 real) anywho, Vera was totally awesome and way i can share and in ways i cannot share. i drove out to MD on saturday and nonsense funmie was complaining i got to her house too early. meaning the time i left home till the time i got to her house did not add up to mapquest's timing. anywho, i got to funmie's she was cooking and ish. i finally met funmies lil sister. she is such an awesome lil girl(reminds me of my nieces) you all remember Vera saying she was gonna hook me up in MD right. YES she did hook me up. i shoulda known that she was talking about herself.(she gave me hints too but i didnt pickup them) anyway he experience was ...

hey womanbeings and manbeings. how una dey o? hope y'all good people are doing great and you all not so good people .... all well. i've been aiight. keeping myself sane as always. i've not been able to post up jhud's beyonce diss song but yall can go on youtube and type in UPSTAGE YOU and voila be ready to get ur ribs cracked over and over again. this time tomorrow i'll be in baltimore with miss vera and her peeps. not to worry y'all u have a nice rep to go represent you guys. i can eat for more than one person. i'll try to dance for more than one person. and i'll sure be glad to help upgrade ur software with stuff that went down. as per my woman bruhaha. it is well! thats all i can say. soon enough u'll hear about it. including the scenes that i would normally delete. make i go this isi-ewu woman house go remind am about my order tomorrow morning. i no wan hear story say the goat head jump comot from pot begin dey make noise o. ms DBL is in naija. i...

hey my people, make una no vex o. i've been trying to put up my much talked about jhudd, beyonce diss song. but this shockwave thing abi wetin dem dey call am sef, no gree me. maibe i'll try a lil more and if i cant i'll jsut have to whitemail it to y'all to listen to. other stuff, orisirisi has been happening o, between this northeast weather changing from nice to freezing every 3days and my practicing dance moves i'd use to sweeps vera's grandma off her feet. then with the side dish of this united nations state i am in.(yes i said united nations and i'll explain when i get the chance to) but be sure its about this state of woman bruhaha that i've been hinting you guys about lately. so it is official i am on my way to baltimore for vera's grandma's party already. cherub is going to NSBE so i'll be attending as single as a dollar bill. i was gonn use her as my handbag b4 but i realised why take sand to the beach when theres enough sand at the...

enjoy...

this has been the long minute i have had between blog entries since i bought my house in blogville. orisirisi has been going on beside the scene, most of it i cant throw on here yet cos its not ripe enough. anywho, body still dey inside cloth, but as usually during one of the silent minutes i had while i was MIA, this came up and i thot to seek wat you all think. have you ever wondered how places get their names or how certain places got their names. I could assume places like new england, new york, were most likely named by the first settlere who crossed the big water to the new world, most likely from west europe, thus they named their new homeland as a reminder of where they originally came from. theres a place on slanting island called snake hill, first thot after hearing the name snake hill might be that its infested or was infested by snakes. but driving up or down snake hill and the way the road meanders makes u think u r doing the snake dance. anywho moving on, u probaby be won...

its been a long micronanomicromini second i've updated this piece of contraption. no be my fault o. i wasnt feeling too good for a minute, then my non eating and sleeping demons called so i had to focus on getting them back on track. doctor cherub actually helped out as always,(I OWE U A PACK OF CHOCOMILO) aside from that i've been deep freezing in the northeast like everyother person who go hit with the deep freeze of the past minute. anywho, i am back and havent felt this good for a minute now. more talk, everyone has been trying to hook my up and play MATCHdontCOME in my life lately, actually some people have been at it for a minute. they relaxed for a while and now that i'm as single as a dollar bill again (or so i would like to assume cos these days u never know, u might have been married off without u knowing) i've been getting requesteseses from left right and center. "engineerAyo theres this chicki know u would gbadun" "chiefo theres this hottie i...

i have always known that letting out our inner demons most times help us heal or somewhat help put those demons in check. some do it by blogging, some by lashing out at everything around them, some by talking to people about it, some by messing with people (vera) and some by writting poetry. i tend to do some of the aforementioned but still i find out i have more to let out. i guess i have more held up in me than i actually thot. been reading the unconfusing posts confusednaijagirl had put up since the short minute ago she started blogging, particularly the culture of silence blog post. dont know what or how but it got me thinking about naija, its society and how they take things like this with less than a grain of salt. anywho, while running thru newspapers this morning, one in particular caught my detention. its headline read,"POETIC JUSTICE" and i was like these slanting island paparazzi people don come again o. KI LO TUN DE? (meaning, whats it this time?) reading on, it t...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY LIL' SISTER! HAVE A TWO_DA_FUL BIRTHDAY! come to slanting island make we go nourish serious nourishment of your choose on my bill.

its been a long road, my short long life has had its ups and not so up moments. sometimes i wonder what if i had done some things differently. what would the outcome of the permutation and combination be. well i cant say for sure what the outcomes would have been but i sure know i'm totally ok with the way things turned out. ...what if on that faithful day, at age 18, i had signed up to join the marines on that faithful day at the American embassy in lagos. today i might just be getting outta service like my cousin did late last year and now studying to become a fashion guru. ...what if i had gone the way of some of my buddies and had joined them in science class. taking physics istead of finance, taking chemistry instead of commerce, taking further maths instead of accounting. who knows maibe i might have patented a pen that would do our course work and exams. ...what if i had given a lil more attention to sports, i might have gone on to become a professional athlete like david be...

hey people, how una dey? kilon wassup? ke du? ba wo ni? ya ya de? i dont have much to blog about o. i just had to put stuff up all in the name of updating. y'all guess wat happened to me today. the one and only green eyed yellow girl called me at 4 o'clock this afternoon, problem is, she has never called me earlier than 10pm b4 since i've known her. i didnt know whether to be scared and run like fire on the mountain. anyway, i was like vera how now? next thing she starts making passes at me. that one made me even more scared cos vera and I no dey use eye see. anyway long story short, she opened up to me that she was buttering me up cos of diamond hawks threat to search for her picture. damn i knew all that buttering up wasnt for nothing. anyway vera, u r still the only blue fish in my fish tank so i would treat u nicely till i find another blue fish. moving on...i finally started sleeping and eating all over again. yeah i know i didnt tell you guys. i had not been eating ne...

you gave me reason to be happy you gave me reason to smile i can still remember how it started ...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE you made me a better person you gave me reason to care i can still remember how it started ...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE you made me treat myself different you made me grin from ear to ear i can still remember how it started ...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE you gave me someone to care for you gave me something to live for i can still remember how it started ...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE you showed me parts of me i never knew existed you showed me what i should do different i can still remember how it started ...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE you gave me a reason to give my 100% you made me open up to a fourth person other than ME, MYSELF n I i can still remember how it started ...but i should have stayed in MY SPACE we were friends before this long minute passed we will remain friends now that the long minute has passed ...

this is in honor of ONB and her TAG! all these people who read her blog and wont do her tag. 1.) How old were you the first time? too young 2.) Name of your first? errmmmm she is isomewhere in the north east 3.) Good or Bad? hmmm! cant remember, think it was one of those things we rushed in and out of. 4.) Name of the worst and why? hmmmm dont know 5.) Name of the best and why? she knows herself, she knows she is. 6.) Weirdest place you ever had sex? the place dont count in my books 7.) Favorite Position: dont know if it has a name, cant describe it for y'all either. 8.) Ever fake an orgasm? do guys have orgasms? 9.) Would you admit it if the person asked? do guys have orgasms? 10.) Favorite time of day to have sex? dont have a time table 11.) Most times you have had sex in one day? hmmm i'll be back make i rewind recount am. 12.) Same person? why not 13.) Ever fantasize about someone other than the one you’re with? hmmmmmmm isnt that cheating... 14.) Restrictions during sex? ....

i've read some blog posts and comments on how people advocate orisirisi. i've seen people beat their chests harder than king kong all in support of NO SEXUAL HEALING TILL MARRIAGE....but being the deep thinker that i am. i start to think, i start to think think....if what is right is no sex b4 marriage, then wat happens to my neighbour ms white who got divorced a lil minute ago. now she is seeing mr. marker. would you say she has to wait to get married to mr marker b4 she can get her kerewa on. cos technically she married innit. she has fulfilled that requirement or maibe its just me. opinions needed abeg...

i dey vex o! i dey vex! somebody beg me b4 i overvex! i dey vex o! i dey vex! no i'm not loosing it. i'm having a serious case of hypervexing like someone whose girlfriend just got stolen from him. this is matter of emergency someone contact the department of houseland security. you wonder why i'mn over vexing right! its simple as ABC. i washed my awesome shirt today o, and b4 i could say shokolokobangoshe, the black color from the shirt had messed up the white cuffs and collar. i am so totally outraged (i sound like a white boy) about this its not even funny. i am mechanically and systematically confused about what to do with this expensive play this thing has caused. its so bad that u wont have to get close to me to realize that someting about my shirt isnt right. this is a serious case of shirt malfunction. i am at a motor crossroad on wat to do with my shirt, the options are these: 1. throw the shirt in the trash after only wearing it one time. 2. take it to the cloth e...

i know 2007 is 3 days old and is already clocking puberty. i just cant move on without rewinding 2006 for a last quick lil minute. In 2006, i became of blogger. its been fun thus far. i've met quite some crazy bunch. read comments that made me think, read some that made me look sane, and i actually put up some comments that made me look even more insane than i thot i was. but all well its all part of what makes bloggers, bloggers. In 2006, i got reconnected with humpty(my buddy from highschool), we hardly ever see each other cos he lives in jersey even though slanting island is just a bridge crossing away, i need to fix that in 2007. In 2006, i met missDBL, she is awesome peoples. she brought out a better me that i didnt know really existed. you showed me the color of love, i really appreciate that a truch load much. In 2006, i moved on to life after college, which is sure filled with a lot of ups and downs. it has given me a couple of headaches and brainaches but i sure will get p...